You’re in a relationship and your significant other has left you. Man or woman, the breakup is not easy on you. You don’t feel happy and are down in the dumps. How do you build your confidence up especially when you feel like a failure that it didn’t succeed. Also, if you were living with the other person, then you may be thinking of looking for another home or an apartment. However, most importantly you can’t concentrate on your writing. So how can you get your confidence in writing again?
First, you are going to have to take time to heal with the ending of the relationship. Getting out of the relationship is not easy. There is always damage whether it is your mental state or your physical state. Your body and mind need healing. You don’t recover right away especially when you are angry or feeling down at the time, it is not the best time to write because you may say the wrong thing and may get yourself in more hot water as it is. Sometimes it is best to journal if you are coming out of a relationship.
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| Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash |
Journaling could be useful in a time like this. Sometimes you may do a blog out of anger and it may backfire and you will be in more heat then before. The world doesn’t need to know you are in pain. You may think it is good, but some things are best not said especially if you may be out to hurt the other person. However, this would be a good time to channel it constructively, maybe in the story you are writing. As long as you change the names, location, and profession, you may be able to write about a person like that. It is just that you don’t want to use real names or identifying characteristics. This may hurt their identity or get you into hot water.
Also, you may need to have some activity to keep you busy during this time of stress. You may have more time on your hands than anticipated. And you may have loneliness settle in. Do something to pick yourself up and watch comedies. This will help you to feel better or if you want to stay in the mood, then write yourself out of it to build up your confidence.
There is no easy way to recover out of a relationship, the damage will have been done. So it is best to recover and start turning your focus into writing again. Build your confidence up little by little. Maybe you can’t concentrate in the beginning and you are angry. Instead of blogging it and airing it out to the world, write it in a journal and get it out.
I should have taken this advice as a writer years ago when I was going through my fallout from a relationship. I aired my dirty laundry for everyone to see and damaged my reputation. Doing that and especially when it is in public, it hurts. So use common sense and don’t act out, act rationally when you are coming out of a relationship. Journal and then come up with a creative story. And if you are blogging, then blog while consciously thinking of what you are writing about and not just a reaction coming out of your relationship.
And if you are getting out of a relationship and you have no one, it will get better. Maybe it is a good time to reevaluate many things such as what you want to do with your life, or maybe it can be a lesser “grand epiphany” such as dusting that old story off that has been sitting on the shelf and needs to be brought back to life again. So it can be a blessing in disguise. Don’t get hung up on him or her. Write that next project and see where it will take you. You will be surprised on the journey your writing will take you on.